tBlog - Cannibals! Cannibals! Cannibals!

I was thinking about cannibalism recently (as I'm often prone to do) and some thoughts came to mind. I thought these all up myself, but I can't vouch for the originality of each and every one since I'm sure many people have made cannibal jokes before. (ie. the classics, "Does this clown taste funny to you?", and "I hate my mother-in-law." "So? Try the potatoes.") Settle down and gnaw on my own contributions...

Is it important for cannibals who are born lactose intolerant to eat people who abstain from dairy products?
And do health conscious cannibals eat vegetarians?
Do they have specialty restaurants that serve only Italian, Chinese or Thai people like we have specialty restaurants that serve only those types of foods? And for appetizers, do they serve actual fingers instead of finger foods?
Do most cannibals hate liver like everyone else?
If cannibal children have friends for dinner, do they get scolded for playing with their food beforehand?
Does watching the movie Hannibal make them hungry?
Do they eat a person from Turkey for Thanksgiving? Are the males served as butterballs? Does anyone eat the stuffing if they put it where I can only imagine they put it?
I bet it’s not wise for a cannibal to ask his girlfriend for a blow job on an empty stomach. Even then, he must really trust her.
Would cannibals eat salads if they were accentuated with Kevin Bacon bits?
Do cannibal men get horny or hungry when they leaf through Playboy magazines?
Some humans are allergic to nuts like almonds. Do you suppose some cannibals have similar reactions to nuts like schizophrenics? Or testicles?
I bet cannibals hate it when it costs an arm and a leg to put dinner on the table.
Do cannibal parents tell their children to stop sucking their thumbs because it will spoil their dinner?
Since saying they’re so hungry they could eat a horse isn’t appropriate, do cannibals say, “I’m so hungry I could eat a jockey”?
Do Meals On Wheels delivered to shut-in cannibals arrive in wheelchairs?
Do they serve sprinters at cannibal fast food joints?
Do cannibals call their barbeques in France French fries?
When an Australian cannibal says it’s time to put another shrimp on the barbie, is that a signal for midgets to start running?
Does a cannibal get gas when he eats an Exxon employee?
Does a cannibal’s stomach get tied up in knots after eating a contortionist?
If a cannibal eats a gay person who is afraid to come out, does he get constipated?
If a cannibal eats a debater, does it disagree with his stomach?
Do cannibals consider Michael Jackson to be white meat or dark?
A scene from a cannibal restaurant

Husband: “Waitress, my wife’s tongue is bitter and my eyes are glazed. And what is this?”

Waitress: “I’m sorry, sir. I seem to have given you the cold shoulder. You wanted a hot foot?”

Husband: “Yes.”

Wife: “My heart is broken, and this? It’s no skin off my back! It’s fatty as hell.”

Waitress: “My ass, it is.” *storms off*